The long-awaited day arrived one week ago. After eight months of one of the most miserable pregnancies I've ever witnessed, my elder daughter gave birth to twin boys by emergency C-section. With a sigh of relief, I learned that both mother and babies were fine and ready for a look-see at the sweet little hospital up in the Amish country of Pennsylvania.
I drove up there, excitedly making birth announcement phone calls along the way, and marveling that this was a beautiful sunshiny, blue-sky-ed fall day to be born. I drove through the rolling countryside, taking note of the still brightly-colored leaves remaining on the trees, thanking the God of my understanding for this happy outcome of years of waiting and praying.
What greeted me in that hospital room were two beautiful pink-and-white "squirmlings," just three hours old, and already taking in the bright new world around them. One of the boys was hatted and swaddled, and he turned his head and looked at me as I spoke to him for the first time! The other little guy was contentedly splayed-out in nothing but a diaper underneath a "warmer," blissfully asleep, arms and legs akimbo, and making little "puppy noises" as he slept.
Mother, zonked-out on heavy pain-killers, opened her brown eyes and looked at me. "Oh, Mom's here," she mumbled, as she drifted back into La-La Land.
My younger daughter, accompanied by her own teenaged daughter, was floating back and forth between babies, touching, cooing, commenting - she's the old hand at this with three children, the youngest of whom is 13. The new father appeared, valiantly trying to hide the fact that he had been, and was, weeping out of sheer joy over the morning's events.
The wiped-out mother opened her eyes again and said, "Oh, Mom's here," before falling asleep again.
The love in that room was absolutely palpable - everyone was beaming, happy. The nurses, the aides, everyone kept saying over and over, "Aren't they cute?" And once they were laid in my granddaughter's arms, I thought she'd never let go. "We've got babies," she squealed.
Mother responded, "Oh, Mom's here," and we all laughed.
With the arrival of the paternal grandparents, the rest of us took our leave. I leaned down to kiss my sleeping daughter good-bye - and whispered to her that I loved her and she'd done a great job. "Oh, Mom's here," she replied.
Yes, my darling, Mom's here, accompanied by the spirit of your beloved father, who probably wanted this for you as much or more than you. And all I could think of was my very first go-round, when it was just your dad and me and one hungry little "squirmling" who so enchanted us, we had two more. And you have a husband who is as thrilled and happy and hands-on as your own dad was - and you have embarked upon this bonding journey that will have no other equal as long as you live.
I wasn't weepy-sad, but I must admit to a little achy-heartedness. I so wished I had your dad with me to share this moment - but at the same time, I could feel him with me. I could feel his relief and joy. I re-lived the happy anticipation we felt together for all that lay ahead of us with our first-born, and now, for you - times two.
Mom's here, and so is Dad - and all our children have children at long last.
"All my life's a circle..."
